Yesterday, we went to Central Park. I went there once about 8 years ago so I don't remember much about it. Now, I love it. I am older and more appreciative of the beauty of the nature. I give myself and my kids some time to stop and smell the roses. I hope to plant love of nature in their souls.
I have a confession: as you know, Sarah is 3 years old but she is so mature and smart that I expect a lot of her and sometimes totally forget that she is just a kid :) I expect her to be fearless, to climb over the trees, to go into ponds but as said before, she is very cautious. Maybe, this is just a part of her maturity, maybe if she was less mature, she would have done these things without over-thinking about them too much but she doesn't. She knows she might fall if she climbs a tree, she knows she doesn't know how to swim so she is very cautious near water. How does she know that? I don't know but she has always been like that. I am trying to persuade her to do these things, I climb the trees in front of her, I lean over waters, I simply do all the kids stuff setting an example for her and for my sake, she gives it a small try and then announces she can't do it. I don't push her to do it but I'm a mother and seeing this fear in her eyes breaks my heart, simply because I feel she is so scared that she is missing lots of fun, that she looks at other young kids and wishes she could climb that tree like them not realizing that they are older. I know not all kids are the same and I know some mothers wish their kids were more cautious but I wish my kid would give it a try knowing that mommy is so close to her that she would jump in the water to get her if something went wrong.
Anyway, I love my kids anyway they are, I love them under any condition, advanced or behind, fearless or fearful, I even love their nonsense :) I find a great joy in just watching them. My mission on Earth is to make them trust themselves and their capabilities more and more, to choose the way they want their lives to be and not follow someone else's script of life for them, to open new horizons in front of them to choose from and to be independent and respectful of others' feelings. I am so glad that Sarah now knows how to share, to wait for her turn and offer help to those who need it.
I have another confession: Egyptian culture is a yelling one, we are loud! We yell in happiness and anger, we were raised this way and watch it all the time. Deep inside, I didn't approve to do it with my kids but helplessly, I did it. it's like I didn't know any better way, I didn't learn any better way. Today, I celebrate my first yell-free week. Yes, it may be simple for all of you but not for me. I had this deal with Sarah, if she caught me yelling, she would stop me and tell me that we had a deal. So, over the past month whenever I started yelling, Sarah would say, "What did we agree on mommy? No more yelling!" and I immediately stop and apologize and we hug. It is so sweet and being very aware of it made me able to succeed this week and the coming years, God willing.
Sorry for the rambling but I'm just trying to be honest here so that you don't think it rains roses and rainbows here all the time ;)
And now, with my pictures explosion, TaDa:
What a bubble!
Here, Sarah let go a little of her fears, she approached the lake, asked to take off her shoes and socks and played in it until 2 geese showed up, lol.
Here, she got stuck on that step, couldn't and didn't want to go any higher.
Smelling the flowers!
These the highest she could climb, lol!
Can you see how happy she was swinging?
Don't you love this face?
I myself adore it :)
Here, it was a fountain. Again, she took off her sneakers & socks and played in the water. This was the most courageous thing she did in a long time. I was happy!
Now to my most important equation of the day:
a fountain + a kid = wet clothes and pants
Wet kid with white pants + sand = muddy pants
if you add both equations, you'd get A VERY HAPPY KID.
Just so that you know how much our kids teach us: in the past, I wouldn't have let that happen. My kid should have stayed clean and decent until we go back home, a messy hair was not acceptable, wet clothes was a dream and playing in the sand was just an illusion. Now, it is all part of the fun equation and kids are learning this way. By the way, I myself hated sand throughout my whole life and it is the reason why I don't like oceans or seas but I don't have to do that to my kids :)
Do you see this, Liz ;) ?
Thank you for listening to my rambling. I hope I didn't offend anyone.